How to cope with financial anxiety

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For many Americans, money problems are quite literally keeping us up at night.

Half of homeowners and renters can't afford their monthly housing payments, prices are still up at the grocery store and credit card debt is at an all-time high.

So what can you do if financial worries are making you sick? One solution might be to see a financial therapist.

“In the world of personal finance, there's such an emphasis on financial literacy and financial knowledge,” says Lindsay Bryan-Podvin, a financial therapist and author of the book “The Financial Anxiety Solution Solution.”

“And while those things are undoubtedly important,” she says, “what we do

with our money is not just about balancing a budget, it's also about managing the stress, the anxiety and coping with spending habits that might not be doing us any favors.”

3 questions with Lindsay Bryan-Podvin

How can financial anxiety lead to long-term physical and mental health problems? 

“Financial stress can lead to symptoms of anxiety, depression and physical health problems such as poor sleep and heart disease. So when it comes to correlation versus causation, what research shows is there is a bidirectional relationship or a two-way relationship between having debt and having clinical depression. So what that means is people with debt are more likely to be depressed and vice versa, which is why we have to address the mental health side of money.

“Plus on top of everything, debt in particular carries such a negative stigma in our country. We have such a strong emphasis on individualism and meritocracy, and we don't often allow people to understand their relationship with money or the systems that make it such that you can carry such high loads of debt.

“And this stigma can impact mental health making it even harder do deal with debt-related stress, even being correlated with actual clinical depression and even suicidal tendencies. A 2013 study found that those who died by suicide were eight times more likely to have debt.”

How can a financial therapist help? 

“When I think about financial therapy, it is not about helping people say happy thoughts to themselves, so they don't feel badly about where they are. It's about helping them to cope enough so that they can move through the world in a way that feels safer and finding appropriate outlets for advocacy.

“So I always start where the client is at, but in most instances, I'm really advocating that the client take care of their own financial well being, so they have the resources both emotionally, financially and energetically to advocate for change.

“So what often happens when we are avoiding something is first just naming with my clients that avoidance is a great coping skill. If you don't look at your bank account or you don't look at your budget, you don't have to deal with any of those uncomfortable feelings that are associated with looking at those things.

“So first taking the shame off of the avoidant behavior is the very first step. Instead of saying, ‘What's wrong with you? Why aren't you looking at your budget? Why don't you have a personal finance app?’ It is instead saying, ‘What are you fearful of? What are the feelings in your body that are coming up that are preventing you from doing these things?’

“So then once we are able to start alleviating that shame, we can learn how to tolerate the discomfort of sitting with what is in our bank accounts? Is it higher or lower than we expect? Are we spending in areas that are out of alignment with our values? What's going on there and how can we take meaningful action so that we can move through having a sustainable household budget and setting meaningful financial goals?

How do you deal with financial anxiety without a therapist? 

“It's OK to not feel OK, but to the second point of not feeling ok all the time, that's really when it's time and it's an indicator that we need to get some additional help. And if you're experiencing anxiety or you're experiencing shame about your relationship with money, there are so many different resources available that can help.

“Yes, a financial therapist is a good step, but let's also address the fact that therapy is not affordable or accessible for everybody in this country. If you live in the U.S., there is something called 211. You can call that number or search for it to be connected with community specific help, and it's often available for free or at a low cost. There are things that you can do in conjunction with community help or with a therapist to help alleviate some of those symptoms and start taking steps towards financial control, and making sure that we are advocating for better, more holistic, systemic change in our country.”

Samantha Raphelson produced and edited this interview for broadcast with Catherine Welch. Raphelson also adapted it for the web.